Up front and honest–I’ve never read a Dan Brown book. My girlfriend made go see Angels and Demons, she reads Dan Brown books. This webcomic was written with her perspective in mind. Let me give you my layperson’s review. If you like the beginning of Baywatch where you watch all the girls run, but would rather see them replaced with Tom Hanks this is the movie for you. Instead of a beach, he runs through Rome examining church statues for clues. Also instead of saving drowning victims when he gets to their churches he watches priests be murdered in ways themed with medieval elements. I guess if you were a childhood victim of the Catholic Church that second part may add some therapeutic value to the movie as well.
My major problem with this is the whole time the Catholic Church is painted as the bad guy from top to bottom no matter who you suspect is in this “who done it”. From all angles the church started it so it’s their fault. So when these priests continue to die with increasing speed throughout the night, you’re not really caring about them. From what my girlfriend tells me they took out at least one medium to large sized character from the novel that makes it to the end of the story as well as removed a relationship between two of the characters making a murder victim really insignificant. Also the ending is changed not enough to change the tenor of the finale, but just enough to make the church save a tiny bit of face yet make the point of the film slightly less cool.
The story itself, included the Hadron Collider you may remember this from geek science articles about 4-6 months ago. Back then we discovered that the blackholes/antimatter everyone was concerned about didn’t swallow us whole and actually dissipate themselves. This movie is mostly based around a bomb that’s going to swallow Vatican City whole–much like Paris Hilton swallowed the gay biker from South Park. As a geek this bothered me. I know it was probably to late to pull a plug on the movie or change the script by the time the real Collider disintegrated the plot, but I was definately grumbling in the theater about it.
Towards the end of the movie Tom Hanks falls into come sort of catacomb with skulls in it. I’m like ‘finally shit’s about to go down, we’re not going to be staring at pointing statues anymore–Indiana Jones shit is about to happen’. I realize at this point I have to Pee; my frequent movie watcher soda was a bad choice. I sprint to the restroom hoping not to miss the cool part. I came back and asked my girlfriend what happened. She says nothing, he just climbed out of the tunnel. I think she’s just pissed that I had pissed during her film. So I ask again, 3, 4 times. She assures me nothing happened in this cool cavern with skulls on the floor. I was definitely glad I peed.
While we thought it would make the webcomic too busy, Don thought it important to note that I wanted to have Clint Howard saying “Who’s cuter now?” (one of my favorite Simpson’s lines) in panel 3.
-Matt
Wow talk about artwork that nailed Ron Howard…even before he is Nailed by Hanks. Nice works gents.
“Hey Mista [M], I’m gonna take Richie here for a ride.”
Is that a lion wearing pilot glasses in the background?
It’s one of many pointing statues in Angels and Demons this one’s pointing to Towerus Mavrickus Buzzus.
Poor Clint Howard
I gotta say Matt, I am a little disappointed. In the last few days the only thing that has been in the news is that plane that went down over the Atlantic. All anyone says about it is, why did it go down? What happened to the plane? Could it have been prevented? What happened? When clearly the answer was right in front of us: Mega Shark. I mean they just put a documentary of Mega Shark out a week ago that included footage of mega shark taking down a plane. Now I realize you already had a mega shark comic, but it seems like another would be prudent in light of recent events.
Speaking of changed movie endings that allowed the church to save face but made the ending less cool (or in this case, not at all cool): REC / Quarantine. Honestly though, the ending wasn’t the only thing that ruined the remake, it was riddle with shitty changes. If you ever get the chance though, check out REC. It’s fan-fucking-tastic.
It’s now on my Netflix.
I netflix’s REC as well. Recent foreign horror films of goodness that I have seen are: Shiver, The Orphanage, and Let the Right one in. The Thai version of Shutter is really, really, good. Jeremy recommended that to me a while back and it ran circles around the American remake. The Asian horrror remakes American style have only worked so far in The Ring, and The Grudge (Only the Directors cut which would have been rated R). Pulse and Shutter were Epic Fail remakes.
I thought Paris Hilton was swallowed by the gay biker in South Park? And not swallowed so much as engulfed via the back entrance…..
On a side note, this strip is so wrong in so many ways! LOL
You'll be pleased to note that I recognised Ron Howard without knowing who Opie was. My first run in with Ron Howard was from Happy Days.