Be it hoax or real, there is a Joaquin Phoenix Documentary circling Cannes. It’s been quoted as having “More male frontal nudity than a lot of gay porn.” and someone dropping a Cleveland Steamer on the late great Joaquin. As much as Donald loves drawing balls and dude junk in general, even we have to draw the line somewhere. I hope you enjoy the two girls one cup reaction video approach here.
*We’re aware of the double this typo in the first panel. Thanks!
ABDOMINALS!!!
If you haven’t seen any of the recent Old Spice commercials, you should. Thank goodness we can just link these here directly for your viewing pleasure.
This first Video is of Comedian Terry Crews, ENJOY it like we have!
Here is the Superbowl Commercial with Mustafa (Ex-NFL player turned actor)
“I’m not a Jedi because I like the hum of the lightsaber in my hand…and I’m not a Jedi because I like being a Jedi. I’m a Jedi because the Galaxy needs Jedi.” This quote is from one of the many stories in the Starwars universe that fits quite nicely for the comic above. Whats your favorite ‘Jedi’ quote?
Horray! It has been one year since Straight Face Comics has launched! Just as messy and just as disgusting as a one year old except we can write our names.
Tributes to Filipino Prisoners dancing to Thriller and the Starwars Kid, if you’ve managed to miss these viral YouTube videos here you go.
THRILLER VIDEO
STARWARS KID
Matt and Jeremy after teaching Jesus 2 play are finally back in their own skin. More important than letting Don know they’re ok, is of course the Iron Man premiere. More on that this Thursday.
IRL Matt hasn’t actually seen Iron Man yet, so no review.
I did however see Kick-Ass. It was more action and less dark comedy than I thought it would be. Not that either portion was bad just not in the ratio that I expected. This was a departure from Nick Cage’s last 10 years of sucking, which was nice. He’s on my list of actors that normally make me avoid a movie. He got there by teaching me many harsh lessons about what a falling star will do to stay out of debt. His quirky was subdued and worked. I am a sucker for a man that needs some revenge. I’ll give the movie a ‘B+/ A-’. I was glad I saw it in theaters. It was great super hero foreplay to get me all worked up before Iron Man 2.
We thought you may enjoy having excuses for being really crappy at games. I’d like to thank contributions from Mike, Derrick, Cliff, and Eric for their contributions. These guys used a lot more reasons about your mother, fetus eating and other obscure references than really didn’t make the cut.
In addition to this fun poster, you can print the friendly black and white version that will print on standard 8.5 by 11 printer paper. Download the pdf or check out the Extras Section.
To add some extra fun. We heard you like to play games, so we also created BINGO cards to go along with the icons from the poster, now you can play a game while you’re online playing games! Anytime you hear an excuse you just mark your card. You’re on your way to a Bingo of a good time. We’ve got two sets of 4 cards that you can print on standard printer paper and cut along the perforated lines. Download Set1 and Set2 or check out the Extras Section for both the poster and the card sets.
Print them out or send them to friends!

In the end it’s always the maniac rogue cop that wins. We’d never learn how awesome it was to be a loose canon if Riggs would have been carted of to jail for breaking into the Diplomatic Immunity Guy’s house. If Judge Reinhold would have escorted Axel Foley out of Beverly Hills or if Harris would have ever gotten the best of Mahoney.
Things will be heating up in Monday’s comic. Two factions will collide. Matt and Jeremy’s comic lives hang in the balance. There will be action, adventure, and more Holy Trinity.
I’ve talked about getting a makeover for the website before, but this time it seems like it’s actually happening. Nothing too major just some Spackle and polish. I imagine it’ll be up in the next few weeks. We’ll even be enabling the ability to buy prints of individual comics. Soon you will be able to hang Rainbow Brite Ass up in your home or cubicle.
I’ve faithfully seen every Kevin Smith flick post Chasing Amy, I discovered Clerks/Mall Rats shortly after Amy was in theaters. I still have not seen Cop Out, I wanted to post a proper review here, but just like my dead comic counterpart I’ve been unable to attend. Instead I bring a dead Corey. I actually liked Lucas quite a bit, Winona Ryder from Lucas was my childhood celebrity crush. I know the redhead from goonies was in it, but I’ve always loved the geek girls. Anyway if you see a nerd in horn rimmed glasses make sure to lean over and tell him he’ll be in softcore with his best friend someday in Corey’s memory. He would have wanted it that way.
Finally got around to addressing the whole cast being dead thing. Hope you guys brought your vomit pales. For those of you who haven’t been following Matt and Jeremy died a few weeks back, their spiritselves clearly don’t have any claw marks or alien eye pokes. Off Putting Talking Dog is also back to what he does best. Well onto some mature subject matter about death, dying and philosphy or more puke jokes, whichever comes first.
Matt’s Death can be found here! Jeremy’s here! Off Putting Talking Dog’s here!
Jeremy imagines the darndest things when he has tiger teeth in his brains. Don bet me I couldn’t kill off all three of our main characters in one month, I have one more comic to do it in and we all know Don is the most susceptible to death. Plus I need to get him to the afterlife anyway or I can’t get paid.










